Today, as we continue and begin to move into week two, we're talking about the roadblock of sexual immorality. When we use that term sexual immorality, what we're talking about are things like pornography, sex before marriage, sex or sexual activity with someone other than your spouse, if you are married in sex or sexual activity with anyone other than between a man and a woman in the context of a marriage relationship. If you wonder whether this is the kind of thing that we should be talking about in church today, let me just share some of the statistics around this particular roadblock called sexual immorality in the United States alone, researchers say that 61% of the population view pornography at least occasionally.You light 10 people up, and sixout of the 10 are viewing pornography occasionally, while many believe that this may pertain to just men, one segment of the population, and the thing that we should have been talking about at the men's conference last week, and not actually in here, let me share with you that statistics say that the number of women Who view pornography at least occasionally is 44%almost halfof the women who live in the United States of America are viewing pornography along with the men, at least occasionally. Here's the other thing, we're not just talking about our teenagers and our young adults. Now, while it is true that the highest percentage of consumption rates is found in those who are younger. More and more research is showing us that pornography is affecting older adults, even senior adults. But Jason, aren't we talking about people out there? I mean, we're not talking about people in the church, right? When you use these statistics, you're talking about people out there in the world. We're not talking about the men and the women and the older adults that are in our churches. Right? Research tells us that just over 50% of Christians report consuming porn with some level of frequency, and that's just those who report it. Chances are that number is even higher. So this isn't just a problem out there, it's a problem in here that's affecting both men and women and young people and older people. And so far, we've just been really talking about the numbers around pornography. Research also tells us that more than half of the adults who are ages 18 to 37 have sent a nude or the number of those that have sent a nude image is around 30 something. 37% of those people, or more than half, I'm sorry, more than half of the adults ages 18 to 37, years old, have sent a nude image of themselves through their phones. 75% of them say that they've received one 70% of the people who, even in the United States, cohabitate before marriage, and 90% nine out of every 10 people have sex before marriage once they do get married. Estimates tell us that one listen to this, one out of every four marriages. In one out of every four marriages, a spouse engages in sex or sexual activity with someone other than their spouse. And again, just in case you're thinking, this is just our young people, statistics tell us that the greatest chances of this occurring are in the ages of those people who are 50 to 79 years old. My point is again that a significant number of people inside and outside of the church, men, women, young and old, are coming up against this road block of sexual immorality in their lives, and it is impacting us in extremely negative ways. Sex before marriage brings guilt and shame into people's lives. It complicates things in a number of ways, physically and emotionally and spiritually. Of course, it doesn't probably surprise you that when you have sex, or someone has sex outside of their marriage, that it's the one of the leading causes of divorce in the United States. Of course, it also brings guilt, also brings shame, also brings isolation, and it doesn't just impact you, it impacts kids and and grandkids in a negative way. There's just so many consequences to infidelity, which again, occurs in at least 25% of our marriages. But what about pornography? I mean, that's not really harming anyone, right? I get it if you're sleeping with someone who's not really your spouse, or engaging in that kind of activity, but is pornography really hurting anyone? Is it that big of a deal? I. Yeah, well, let me just tell you that there are more and more research that's being done. There are more organizations that are popping up that are sharing information, real life stories, about the things that they're hearing. And we're not talking about just Christians. We're not talking about just people who are in the church. We're talking about in secular society, there are organizations that are popping up that are beginning to report the kind of things that are happening to people when they engage in these kind of behaviors somewhat regularly, I came across an article called 10 negative effects of porn on your brain, body, relationships and society, which, again, came from a secular website, a secular business. And for time's sake, I'm not going to read all 10 of them, but let me just quickly list a few. Number one, porn negatively impacts relationships. According to a study that tracked couples over time, porn consumption was the second strongest indicator that a relationship would suffer, and made people twice as likely to get divorced or break up, porn can become habit forming. It's probably no secret to most people that it can become an addiction. Number three, porn harms sexual function and makes people more sexually illiterate. Let me explain. Research shows that porn often leads to less sex and less satisfying sex. It is also associated with sexual dysfunction, difficulties with arousal and let and leads people to believe that what they see in videos, what they're learning about what sex is supposed to really be like, is not the kind of thing that sex actually ends up being like once someone is married, so they're illiterate about what's supposed to happen, and then they think it's supposed to look like whatever it is that we're seeing on these videos, and it's not that way, and it causes confusion. And then you don't understand what's happening, and then your spouse doesn't understand what's happening, and all kinds of effects are happening. Number four, porn can actually change a consumer's brain. Pornography can take our brains natural stimuli our desire again. This is a secular website. This is not coming from a Christian perspective. This is just the things that they're learning. Right? Pornography can take our brains natural stimuli, which is our desire for intimacy and connection, and give us more exaggerated and super normal versions of that desire through the neuro plastic process, porn can change what we perceive as normal, wrap what we or warp what we find exciting, and actually make real intimacy seem less interesting by comparison. Translation, most people who view porn would rather view porn than have real sex. It's more satisfying to them once you've consumed it. This is what's happening to your brain. Number five, porn fuels mental health issues. A number of studies that have found and link a comparison or between pornography consumption and mental health outcomes like depression, anxiety, loneliness, lower life satisfaction and poor self esteem and overall mental health and so as you can see, this is a roadblock that is affecting many people and causing so many negative consequences that are beginning to get reported. These are just things that science is teaching us, as well as stories that we're hearing out of people's lives when they're faced with this roadblock and engaging in this particular kind of activity, it is robbing us of the abundant life that we have in Christ and the life that he created for us In marriage relationships. Maybe you're not one of those statistics. Maybe it's not a roadblock that you are facing. And you're sitting here thinking, well, this doesn't really apply to me today, but I can guarantee you it applies to someone that you know. It applies to your kids, maybe, or your grandkids, or someone that you love, because it is affecting so many people and so what we're talking about today and praise God, if it's not something that you are facing and engaging with, and a roadblock you are facing this morning, but this might help you to be able to reach and minister to those who even are and so what I want to do is just quickly look at this from a biblical perspective and talk about some of the ways that Jesus can then Begin to lead us around this roadblock in our lives, and how we can help other people do so. And so we're going to start all the way back at the creation account. We're going to the opening pages of our Bibles in Genesis, chapter one, beginning in verse 27 it says, So God created mankind in his own image. In the image of God, He created them, male and female. He created them. God blessed them and said to them, Be fruitful and increase in number. Fill the earth and subdue it. You probably don't need me to translate that for you, but in the opening pages of your Bible, God just told Adam and Eve to go have sex.So what it says, how else would you be fruitful and multiply? Right? I just want us to see that if we're going to understand the biblical perspective of sex, we have to understand and know that God created it. It didn't come from Satan, it came from God. It's a good thing, and that God actually has an expectation for Adam and Eve to participate in what it is that he created this activity called sex. Now, part of the reason why he created it, we see in this verse, is certainly for procreation, all right, to have offspring and to fill the earth here, but biblically, we see in a number of other places that that's not the only reason that God created sex. If you've never read the Song of Solomon, you could go home this afternoon and read it, and some of you would start to go I had no idea that was in my Bible. It might even make you blush a little bit the things that are actually in there, right? Well, this is why we see the Apostle Paul writing things in the New Testament around First Corinthians chapter seven, where he says to husbands and wives not to deprive each other of sex. Why would he ask them not to deprive each other? Because part of the reason that God created it was for enjoyment and for them to be participating in it. And so therefore, what we see is that sex is not just for procreation. But he did create it for us to enjoy. It is something he created for us to experience pleasure in. But what we have to see is that that pleasure, that enjoyment, that procreation, is not intended to be with just anyone or everyone. Genesis, chapter two, verse 24 says that is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife and they become one flesh. If you're following along in a real Bible or can highlight or underline, highlight or underline the words united to his wife and become one flesh. That is important language to describe, again, one woman and one man coming together in marriage. They're being glued together. They're becoming one flesh. Now, while this is certainly a reference, in one way, to a sexual union, a bodily oneness, that is here, there are a number of places in Scripture that all throughout this oneness in our Bibles, this marriage union is way more than just physical. It's not just a bodily union of oneness, but a spiritual oneness, in a solical of oneness. I mean, we are talking about a union that runs deep on so many levels. It's like any any other relationship that God designed. So when we talk about marriage being a bodily union, a spiritual union and a solical union, we talk about sex being a part of all of those things that it was meant to be, what we see is that there's so much more going on during the act of sex than just pleasure, just for fun. And I love that science is now catching up with what the Bible has said over 1000s of years ago. Joe McElhaney and Freda McKissick bush in their book titled hooked new science on how casual sex is affecting our children, write this scientifically. We know that sex engages us hormonally, neurologically and psychologically. It forms intense bonds, mentally, emotionally and physically. And then they go on to talk about the different hormones, like oxytocin for women and vasopressin in men, and how these hormones are sometimes called and I quote the commitment hormones, because they lead women to increased trust, causing her to want to nurture and protect the one that she's bonded to and then causing the man to be protective and to dire commitment and rouse loyalty. In other words, when God created sex to be between one man and one woman in the context of a marriage relationship, he even created hormones to be released during the act that would reinforce their lifelong spiritual, so local and bodily commitment to each other. And so sex is designed to reinforce this marital union and this oneness, and if that's what's going on and what's being released, to reinforce these lifelong commitments, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that if you're engaging in that behavior with someone who you are not in union with in that way, it's going to confuse things, it's going to cause all kinds of problems and bring those problems into your relationship and into your life. The same thing happens when spouses sleep with someone else who's other. Than their spouse. And honestly, the same thing happens when you're viewing porn, and hormones are kicking in and trying to reinforce a real relationship that was designed between a man and a woman for a lifelong commitment, and you're looking at a screen. Tell me that doesn't confuse things crazily. It's causing so many problems. And so what we see is that sex is designed to be way more than for just physical pleasure, but that is what Satan wants you to believe. That's the message that he wants you to believe. Because Satan takes God's good things and he twists them and he distorts them and tries to steal and kill and Rob and destroy you, but he does it in such a way that he still convinces you that that's what's best for you and what you should actually be doing while he's stealing and killing and destroying you, just this twisted thing that He's doing. This is how Jesus referred to satan in John, chapter eight, verse 44 he says he referring to Satan was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies. Revelation, 12, nine. He's even referred to as the deceiver of the whole world. The deceiver of the whole world God takes God's good things, twists them, things like sex, and spreads lies about them, deceives people and tricks people into thinking that it is something that it is not. And so Satan influences our culture, and he says things like, listen, sex is good with anyone and everyone. Sex is just for bodily pleasure. Porn doesn't harm anyone. It's just entertainment. It's how you learn more about how to have a set have sex and listen, you'll stop being able to look at porn whenever you get married, all of those desires will go away. They're all lies. Satan trying to deceive you and rob you from the abundant life you have. And he spreads it through culture. And as he spreads it through culture, more and more people engage in it, and it becomes normal. And then that's the thing, that he uses, even us in the church, to go it must be right, because everybody else is doing it. Everybody is what could be wrong with it? If everyone else is doing it, he's the deceiver of the whole world. This is how he acts with God's good things. And so that's why, when the writers of the New Testament are writing to address churches, Christians, people who are believers and have this new life in Christ, and teaching them about their new life in Christ, they address things like sexual immorality, things that no longer line up with who you are in Christ, and the way God created things to be in the first place. For example, the apostle Paul writes this in first Thessalonians, chapter four, verses three through five, for this is the will of God, your sanctification, that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God. The word translated sexual immorality is is porneia. It's a general term for any sexual activity outside of marriage between a man and a woman. And so Paul's saying, Listen, this sexual immorality, these kinds of behaviors, do not line up with your new life in Christ, it's not how God intended them to function in your life, and Satan is using it to rob you and to steal, kill and destroy. Now, some people read that and they go, God, just don't want us to have any fun, right? Such a mean God. Why would he create something like that and then not allow us to participate in it? Don't forget that he's the one who created it, and he created for your good. And if he knows how he created it, he understands how you're going to enjoy it best. You're being convinced for something counterfeit that's not as good. It's the way he created it. You think you're getting some fulfillment and experience out of it in this way. Wait till you experience it in the way he created it. It's the way he designed it to be. Butwhat if you've already messed up, ifyou've already had sex before marriage?What if you've cheated on your spouse, but if you'reyou've looked at pornography, and you're continuing to look at pornography, what do you do? Let's get really practical for a minute. I'm gonna list six things I think the Lord would lead us. I'm. God to engage and participate in our life, to move us around this roadblock of sexual immorality, taking notes. It'd be a good time to pull out a pen and write these things down. Number one, admit that you have a problem. That, of course, all starts with seeing sex from a biblical perspective, seeing God's truth about his creation and what is best for you. It starts with you saying, what I am doing is wrong. Why is that important? Because a lot of us tend to justify what it is that we're doing. Listen, I'm just learning about sex. Whenever I'm watching porn, my spouse isn't treating me the way that I'm supposed to be treated, and therefore I deserve this, right? Everyone else is having sex before marriage, and so we just justify what it is that we're doing, and we have to stop justifying our behavior and admit that it's sin, admit that this is something that we're engaging in that is not God's best for us. Number two, after we admit that we have sinned in this way, and it's a roadblock. It's a problem we receive, and we thank God for the forgiveness that we have in Christ. Because Jesus took every sin, all sins for all time, to the cross, and so there's no sin, even the sexual sins that he didn't take to the cross, that He hasn't buried and had victory over whenever he was raised from the dead. And so we come before him when we face this road block, and we admit again to Jesus that what we've been doing was wrong and not his best for us, but then we thank him for the unconditional love and the forgiveness that we have in Christ so that we can begin to move forward in allowing him to give us victory and move us beyond this roadblock. Now, if you've never accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, then this is not a sin that keeps you from his salvation. Again. He took them all to the cross, and so he loves you. It's part of the reason he died for you. He wants to forgive you. He wants to give you this new life in Christ and begin to show you what he created you for and how to experience these good gifts and blessings that He created for you to experience in this world. And so if that's you, it starts with just accepting the finished work that he's done by receiving his gift to you, and you do that by through faith. You put your faith and trust in Him, and then you're completely forgiven. You become a new creation in Christ, and then you can fight from a different place than before. Number three, figure out why you're doing it, why you're engaging in sexual immorality and whatever act it is for you, some people want to make this so simple, it's just lust. People are just dealing with lust. It's just something that they do, right? But usually, sexual sin goes way, way deeper than that. People use porn and sex to try to get their needs met, like needs of love and contentment and security and worth. And so they feel unloved, they feel insecure, and so they go to look at porn or to have sex with someone else, to feel loved, to feel more secure in that moment. And a lot of times, whenever you stop and you think about this kind of thing, what you'll notice is a pattern. You'll notice that if there are breaks in the times that you're viewing these things or engaging in these types of activities, that there are moments you're stepping back into it, and something is happening around that moment that's common with the other time you entered into that moment, and then the other time that you entered into that moment, and there's these times where maybe you were just feeling low and you were down, or you were depressed, or it's whenever you were stressed that you would begin to engage in these things. It's whenever you couldn't control something in your own world and you just needed to feel some control over something. So you engage in it in this way. When you're fighting with a spouse and you're justifying other things, there's something that Jesus will reveal to you around this pattern to just not go it's just lust. Get over your lust, like there's something deep going on there that you're feeling like you've got to get a need met in an illegitimate way through this way, other than in Christ. And when you figure out why you're beginning to get at the root of the problem and allowing Jesus to give you more victory over it, because that's now exposed and you understand part of why it is that you're engaging in it in the first place. Number four, don't fall for Satan's lies that your needs are not met in Christ. If, if, if you notice a pattern that you're going to these to try to get your needs met, then we've got to understand and know that all of our needs that we have in Christ are needs of love, contentment, worth and security and things like that are met in Christ. We have all of those. And so if Satan convinces you that you feel in such a way that You're unloved and you've got to expect. Experience this, to feel that love, we recognize that as a lie of Satan, and we go above and beyond our feelings to renew our minds to the truth that I am loved even when I'm not feeling loved, that when I'm feeling insecure, that I am secure in Christ, and therefore, I don't need to go to that thing to get that need met, because I renewed my mind to the truth that that need is actually met, regardless of how strong it feels that it's not recognizing the lies, replacing them with Truth Number Five. Know what you have in Christ in times of temptation, sometimes sexual sin can feel overwhelming. It can feel like you have no power over it. But if you are in Christ, guys, that is not true. If you're in union with Jesus, you're in union with the one who calmed the wind and the waves with his more voice, do you not understand the kind of power that you have dwelling within you to overcome times of temptation. In this way, also in Christ, you've been made into a new creation. You have a new heart. You have a new nature. You are no longer a slave to sin. Sin is not your master. Guys. At the very core of your being in your union with Christ, there is nothing about the new creation that you've become in Christ that wants to look at porn. There's nothing in your union with Christ, in the new creation that you've become that wants to actually have sex with someone outside of marriage, or before you get marriage, or someone other than your spouse, if you feel otherwise, that's not coming from who you are in Christ. That's Satan deceiving you and in your flesh trying to get your needs met from something that Christ has already met. Those needs in and for a lot of people, just understanding that, because, again, it can feel so strong at times, like it's just, it's just a part of me. I can't not do it. It's who I am. You go, Wait a minute. There's nothing in me. If this is Jesus, and I'm in a spiritual union with Jesus, and we're now one, I've become this new creation in Christ. There's nothing about Jesus that wants to look at porn. Nothing about Jesus that's saying that he wants to sleep with someone that's not his spouse. Doesn't apply just getting weird, right? But in that union, then it can't apply to you either. And so that's nothing that doesn't come from you. There's nothing wrong with you at the core of your being in Christ, it's your flesh and a pattern and something that Satan has deceived you in and for a lot of people, just realizing that it's not actually a part of you. You're not a slave to it. No matter how strong it feels, you're able to recognize that's not true. Your emotions and your feelings are lying to you. It's like, all of a sudden, the chains just start to drop. What you could never experience victory over before you're going, Wow, I wish I would have known before that this is not a part of me, that I'm not a slave to it. It doesn't own me, that I don't have to fight for victory. I can live from a place of victory. Such a big difference when you live from a place of victory over fighting for a victory that you don't believe that you have in the first place. And then finally, Number Six, tell others and stay in community. Satan wants you to live in the dark. He wants you to live in the shame. He wants you to live in the isolation. You can't tell others about this, because what would they think about you? You'd be ruined. But if you have a new identity in Christ, then you can bring anything out into the light, because your behavior no longer defines you. Who you are in Christ, it's what defines you. And so you can tell others, so do that? Tell someone that you trust, admit when you're struggling, ask for prayer. Tell someone if you mess up, there's so much freedom that this can bring from just getting it out into the light and not living in the dark and holding on to it. And then the last thing I'll say around that topic of staying telling others and staying in community,we have to do a good job of creating safe places for people to do that, that you're safe to come with me for that, and that happens in our churches and in our Sunday schools and in small groups. That happens in our homes parents, that happens with us as grandparents. If your teenager is struggling with this roadblock, you want to create a safe place for them to come and talk to you around this that it's not weird, it's something that God created, and that you can tell me if you've messed up in this area, the biggest problem we make as parents is we overreact in this moment, and we make them feel more guilt and more shame and that they should have never come out of hiding until. Told us in the first place because of the way that we react whenever they do, and the things that we strip them, that we take away from them immediately they learn. I won't tell you ever again whenever I'm struggling. And so we've got to create these safe places for them to come to us and go, Man, this is what's going on in my life, and I can't figure it out, and for us to receive them the same way that Jesus does with unconditional love and man. Thank you for sharing that. Did you know that I've had a problem with that before? And share your own stories and struggles with them in that and invite them into it with you, rather than overreacting in a way that they learn to never bring that up to you or to anyone else again. It's a tactic of Satan that keeps them pressed down. Soadmit that you have a problem.Thank Jesus for His forgiveness. Figure out why you're doing it. Know that your needs are met in Christ. Know what you have in Christ to fight the temptation, tell others live in the light, guys, let's be a church who lives in the light, who points other people to Jesus' complete forgiveness, to point them to their true identity and who they are in Christ and how to experience true, abundant life in Him and in His ways that he designed sex to function in our lives, amen. Amen.